I was just doing a search on Google for Detroit. I have been scanning websites like a crazy person with no luck. apparently, he has no internet profile. Someone with his name, however, does own a car dealership and I got to see hundreds of pictures of cars. On a whim, I googled myself. I have done this before but never with images. what came up were two pictures; one is of me and my oldest, dearest friend, standing together and looking hopeful. The other picture that comes up is this:
What is this guy doing? Why is he holding a chicken? I was going to blur his face to avoid any trouble posting his picture, but the resolution is so low, it doesn't seem to matter. What does seem to matter, is that according to the Internet, I'm either with my oldest, dearest friend, or I'm this guy holding a chicken. I hate birds. I would never hold a chicken. I would never even pet a chicken. I can't think of single situation in which I would even be anywhere near a chicken. But this guy? He looks pretty comfortable. He and the chicken look happy together. I guess I should be happy for them, happy that they have each other. I just wish that guy would change his name.

One should really not be allowed access to one's laptop when one has had 3 vodka grapefruits. If one finds oneself in front of one's laptop after 3 vodka grapefruits, one should certainly not email anyone of consequence. If one should find oneself emailing anyone of consequence, one should at least have the good sense to blind copy oneself on said email so that one can adequately prepare oneself for the consequences in the morning.
One is very very lucky that one is still witty and seemingly well thought out even after 3 vodka grapefruits.